Last night I watched the episode of Deadliest Catch where Captain Phil Harris passed away. Even though I am not a huge fan of reality TV shows this one is different. We have seen these men and their colleagues/comrades and family member toil over one of the most difficult and dangerous jobs. The Captains of the boats have worked very hard their entire lives dedicating their energies and passion to the sea and fishing. The dedication of these men and their families (wives and children who are back at home) is commendable. Sure they're doing something that they love and has been ingrained in every fiber of their being. But what an inspiration.
Watching the family and friends hear of Phil's death was very difficult. The pain and shock in their eyes and body language was devastating. Throughout the show there were clips of people telling how Capt. Phil had influenced their lives by watching the show in their living rooms. There were words of wisdom repeated, funny anecdotes, and observations of a sincere, no-nonsense kind of guy. I really appreciated the show for the first time realizing that documenting someones life for TV isn't all that bad. We can all learn from others when we have the ability to step into their lives and see how someone else lives and breathes.
I could not stay up to watch the hour long tribute to Captain Phil. DH had to record it for me. I'd had enough sadness for one night. But before I headed upstairs to read my book I heard the narrator say, stick around to learn about the remarkable life of Captain Phil Harris.
I hope that when my time comes, my life will be considered remarkable. Let's face it. Not everyone lives a remarkable life. Some people take for granted what they are given and never do anything to better themselves. But you do not have to become President to have a remarkable life. Living an impressionable life is intimate to each individual. We can be remarkable to all those who love us in our own way.
As I have gotten older my drive to do something special with my life has increased. Hearing about the lives of my grandparents and the impression they made on friends, family, and colleagues inspired me to live every day to the fullest. Be a good person to all and do the best I can in everything I attempt. As my parents get older I am amazed at what a wonderful life they have lived together. They started dating on and off at 16. My mother recently gave me her cheerleading pin and my fathers fraternity pins from college. I wear them on my lapel every once in awhile. Their memory box is full and continues to over flow.
Recently I have made some big changes in my life- lifestyle changes. For the first time I finally decided to grow up and start really taking care of myself. 32 years old is the time to take back my health and do whatever I can to live a long life. I understand that I do not have control over what may happen to my body. We all have the potential to get sick or get in an accident of some sort. All the more reason to use what I have and appreciate my health and all the little things that make up me. I have started eating better. When I say eating better I mean actually eating meals. I have never had a big appetite, but I am now forcing myself to have balance in my life when it comes to my diet. We now make a point of sitting at the dining room table as a family to eat dinner. I want Min man to understand that dinner is an important time of the day to reconnect with one another- not watch TV.
I have stopped drinking alcohol. I do enjoy a Cor.ona or glass of wine but, in my attempts to cleanse my body I am giving it up for awhile. I have been running! My knees are shot so I will never be a long distance runner, but when I go on my fast walks, I have been jogging for a half mile or even a mile and then walking again. My husband has also committed himself to getting healthier. It is so much easier to make a big change like this when you have someone striving for a better lifestyle as well.
Life is a continual challenge full of lessons. So many things I experienced in my younger years are coming to light and making sense. I have begun to see how my life has unfolded up until now, why I faced this challenge and that difficult time. What's hard about life is being acutely aware that tough times are inevitable. Being mentally prepared that my life is going to continue to throw me curve balls helps me feel more in control.
I still face challenges, old challenges. I am still trying to make sense of many things but at the same exact time I am planning to live a full life. I decided not to hide from things that come into my life that are difficult. If I do not deal with them now, I will either have regret or a continual problem knawing away at me. I need to be able to look back and say I did everything I could to be healthy and happy so that I can give my son the mom he deserves. A whole person who is there for him 100%. And ultimately there for myself 100%. You only get one chance.
We all have the opportunity to instill an impression- big or small. Taking a leap of faith to go for that dream of opening a store or saving your money to make that long-awaited trip are the blocks placed on the foundation of our existence. We should all have a bucket list. But maybe it would be better to check off the items all throughout our life instead when it seems like time is running out.
My biggest goals awaiting a check mark:
Remarkable life, indeed.